Sacrificers first test for Rat City All-Star Team

by Jim Almy

Candid photo of Jukes surveying her team from the bench during an All-Star scrimmage at the Rat’s Nest. Photo by Danny Ngan

It opens with a battle against some familiar faces and closes with a bout against invaders from the south on Saturday, May 10, when the Rat City Rollergirls debut the second half of their season at KeyArena.

The RCRG All-Star Program will put two teams on the track. In bout one, Rain of Terror (ROT) faces Antagonists, a USARS team from Seattle. For the second bout, the RCRG All-Stars battle the Sacred City Derby Girls’ Sacrificers from Sacramento, CA in a sanctioned bout that counts for rankings towards the WFTDA Championships in November.

With the All-Star lineup announced in March, and a new Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA) rule set for the 2014 season, Seattle’s Division I WFTDA league (Rat City) is ranked 17th in the world, and positioned to have a strong year. Rankings are very fluid this early in the season as teams are only beginning to test themselves against each other. The Rat City All-Stars were ranked #13 a month ago and, according to Ophelia Melons, the league’s Interleague Coordinator who knows as much as anyone about teams from around the country and world, “We we will crack the top ten this season.”

A win against the Sacrificers, presently ranked #32, will aid that cause.

“Thirty four players make up the Rat City All-Star Program. That group is split into two teams. The top 20 skaters become the chartered representatives that skate for RCRG in international competition for the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA),” Melons said. “The remaining skaters comprise our ‘B’ Team, called the Rain of Terror (ROT). Our B team is extremely competitive and could easily beat many Division I (top 40) WFTDA teams.”

The RCRG All-Star Team is coached by League Champion Derby Liberation Front’s Ho Chi Danh. That team includes:

Bill F Murray

Carmen Getsome


Full Nelson


Kendle Bjelland

LeBrawn Maimes

Luna Negra

Missile America

Ophelia Melons

Parker Eyeout

Patience Grasshopper

Raven Seaward

Rawkhell SqWelch

Rumble Fist

Sami Automatic

Shorty Ounce

Sintripetal Force

Teddy Rupp

Wreck n Shrew


Full Nelson blocks at the 2013 Division I Playoffs last fall in Salem, OR. Photo by Bob Ayers
Full Nelson blocks at the 2013 Division I Playoffs last fall in Salem, OR. Photo by Bob Ayers

Coach Danh said that Jukestapose has suffered a season-ending knee injury and won’t be skating with the All-Star team.

The Sacred City Derby Girls was founded in the fall of 2006 in Sacramento, CA. Their first season was in 2007 with two teams, the Sacrificers and the Disciples. They added three more teams in 2011, The Roseville Trainwreckers, The Donna Party, and The Midtown Maulies.

Sacrificers’ skater Evil Shenaningans said that their area is rich with opponents and that teams they have played this season in either scrimmages or bouts include Bay Area Derby Girls, Sac City Rollers, Santa Cruz Derby Girls and the Undead Betties.

Melons suggested that the Sacrificers will bring one skater, The 4 Closer, who is always tough to handle against any competition. Shenaningans would only say that every skater on their team was outstanding in their own way.

As with derby skaters everywhere, the members of the Sacrificers represent the usual variety of careers and occupations. Shenaningans listed a few. Colt 45 works for Vegan Outreach, Xerox dedicates all her free time to the league to help make the league function, Cash Money works 2 jobs and goes to school, Annie Ankle Biter is an accomplished business owner, Rose Villain was spending every weekend driving to LA and back (6 hours+ each way) so that her daughter could play softball, Neill N Weep works with children and has the patience of a saint with them, Mazel Tough Cocktail is our resident knitter and a great party starter, Lora Stabs came from banked track and gives some of the most inspirational speeches you have ever heard, R. Tillery is a mother, runner, bigwig in her softball association, and photographer, and Billie Jean Beretta has a degree in Criticism and Public Communication and loves soccer.

The Sacrificers will follow their bout against the Rat City All-Stars with a Sunday morning hangover bout against Jet City Bombers at the Rat’s Nest. It’s a bring your own chair and mimosas kind of event, which is $10 at the door.

For tickets to the first WFTDA sanctioned bout of the Rat City All-Star season on 5/10 at KeyArena go HERE